I Like You

A little bit more than I'm willing to admit. Not even to myself.

Last night I obsessively crammed my mind with enough anime to squeeze everything else out through my ears, and made cookies at midnight. My dad crept into my room squeaking madly and wearing a mouse mask at some point, but fled after I informed him there was a cat in the room. I'm not entirely sure whether that was a hallucination brought on by lack of sleep or not. I'm hoping not. I have so much to do, and I'm doing none of it. YAY.

My mobile has no credit. I refuse to feel guilty about this, because I'm too busy feeling guilty about everything else.



Here is a story I told to someone else some time ago, in pretty much the same words:

Once upon a time there was a hedgehog whose name I have forgotten. He lived in a dark, dark forest (whose name I have forgotten) but that is okay, because I'm pretty sure it was called The Dark, Dark, Forest. So.

He had a pretty nice time of it there because there were no roads, so he never got flattened, and there were no old ladies putting out milk, so he never had to explain to them that he was lactose intolerant. In those days, this was a serious problem, because as we all know old women can be unbelievably sly and malicious, and would inevitably try and trick him by calling it soy milk when in fact it was really dairy. Old women cannot be blamed for this because of the "Change Of Life" my mother is always referring to mysteriously. You might have thought it was about the menopause but actually it has everything to do with lactose intolerant hedgehogs. But I digress.

The only problem with this was that he had to go to the supermarket every day to pick up soy milk, and being a very lazy hedgehog he tired of this trip. So he began to daydream about the forest across the river.

Now, this forest was called the Yum Yummy Gumdrop Forest, and you can imagine what a forest like THAT was like. All the animals from the Yum Yummy Gumdrop Forest were fatter than badgers (except the badgers, who were much fatter than that), and they all wore expensive watches and drove flash cars. Our hero seethed with chronologically deprived jealousy.

So, one day, he decided to travel across the river to the Yum Yummy Gumdrop Forest. This may seem like something simple he should have thought of long before now, but in fact it was VERY HARD. Very hard indeed. Because hedgehogs have short legs and stuff. Anyway.

TO BE CONTINUED... Except it doesn't matter: No one reads this.